Democrats Complain JD Vance Already Has
Three More Children Than A Minnesota Daycare
After JD Vance announced he and his wife are expecting their fourth child, Democrats criticized the
Vice-President, pointing out that he already has three more children than a Minnesota daycare.
“The problem is the Vances will raise these kids to be successful,” said a Democratic spokesperson.
“The last thing American needs is more self-sufficient people too stupid to realize they could just
live off Welfare.”
In addition, there are also general concerns about high white birthrates.
“Those people from Appalachia…they’re all alike,” the spokesperson said. “All they do is breed.”
“And it’s OK to criticize them for it, because they’re white.”
Democrats claim Caucasian reproduction is doing great harm to the ‘Great Replacement Plan’, which of
course is just a right-wing conspiracy theory, and nothing they know about, or support, or anything.
At publishing time, Democrats were also investigating whether the Vance children might take many of
he jobs reserved for bi-racial kids in TV commercials.
- The Satirized Evening Post
January 22, 2026