Putin is Furious that Biden is Allowing Russia to
Sell More Natural Gas to Germany

Vladimir Putin

MOSCOW, RUSSIA – This past weekend, a majority-state owned Russian energy company resumed building a pipeline in Danish waters, which will allow Russia to sell more natural gas to Germany, and increase Russian leverage over Europe.

Russia had halted the project during the Trump Administration due to the threat of US sanctions, but resumed it under the Biden Administrations newer, "tougher" stance on Russia.

“Biden is so much tougher on Russia than Trump,” Putin complained. “Allowing us to sell more natural gas to Germany will kill us.”

“Biden also punished Russia by banning fracking and revoking drilling leases on US federal land," said Putin. "With less oil on the market, oil prices will surely rise, and Russia will make more money.”

“Mr. Biden has surely taught Russia a lesson.”

“What brilliant moves might Mr. Biden make next to further pressure Russia?” Putin worried.
“Allow us to get more control in the Middle-East?
Give more money to our ally Iran?
Allow us to take more land from the Ukraine and Crimea?”

He then pleaded, “But whatever you do, My. Biden...please don’t throw us into the briar patch!”

- The Satirized Evening Post
February 10, 2021

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